I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
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The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize