friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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