i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
