you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
