I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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