Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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