Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize