guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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