apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
this beer tastes like vomit already
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize