i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
