careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
