So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
