its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
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