I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
