Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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