we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
