I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
