At least make sure they are 18
Why
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize