She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I enjoy the company of your penis
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize