she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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