physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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