I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
