In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
