the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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