5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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