hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize