We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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