I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
