The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
