And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
