Im at strip club and am horny
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
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