OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Drunk walkin through police station. America
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize