You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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