i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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