I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Randomize
