did you get engaged???
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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