She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
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