the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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