I got chris browned last night
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
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