I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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