I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize