how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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