you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
