yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
