We're facebook friends in real life
please come you make the beer taste better
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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