this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
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