We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
My vagina is very pro this idea
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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