Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
