btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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