If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
