While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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