Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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